Things are not going well with the dog

[quietann]

My home has been invaded by a large, smelly, impolite animal and I don't like it. See http://sophiethedog.livejournal.com/1698.html

You have been spared my most rantalicious thoughts, which were astonishingly strong last night. Got me on the "Why did I marry HIM?" trail of tears, and I don't even have PMS!

Now I don't know what to do either, but maybe look for another place to stay for the next week...

(ETA: Thing is, it's my house too, well, emotionally anyway. Walking out, even for a week, because of a dog, would not be a good precedent. But I got myself into this by not saying, "No. No dogs in our house!" the first time it came up. I thought I'd "see how it goes.")

Comments

[donnad.livejournal.com]

Baby gate to keep the dog confined in the kitchen? Take the dog into the garage to play, tossing a ball in the garage is almost as good as outside, but you wont get all wet. I might suggest confining the dog in the garage, but it's still a bit chilly for that.

[quietann.livejournal.com]

um, we don't have a garage. We have a barn, but it's full of stuff we really, really don't want the dog getting into.

I tried to get a baby gate but we'd need a very very tall one to confine her, and then what does she do when she needs to "go" very early in the morning?

[donnad.livejournal.com]

I meant the barn, last time I was actually in it, it was pretty empty, I guess that was a while ago. :)

Yeah I see the problem with a baby gate not being tall enough.

Well, If you need a place to get away you can always come visit us.

[gingicat]

I'm pretty booked this week (what with houseguest and all), but if all you want is quiet space, you can likely come hang out here. :)

[awfief.livejournal.com]

looking for a space to crash isn't a bad idea -- if you can't stand the heat get out of the kitchen, right? According to the government (assuming you got legally married and not just ceremonially) the house is yours, even if he paid for the whole thing. :)

You made a decision, and now you are trying to live with it when you realized it was wrong. Trying is a GOOD thing, but so is admitting defeat and cutting your losses, and saving your relationship. :)

We have an extra bed if you want it, but we're in Watertown.

[dianec42.livejournal.com]

I thought I'd "see how it goes."

Oops. Ummm... now you know? (-:

How long is the dog taking over the place visiting for? Would it help to keep reminding yourself this is only temporary?

[quietann.livejournal.com]

She will be here until Thursday (and I will be working that day, so I won't be able to tell the in-laws to their face that I don't want her back.)

[marmota.livejournal.com]

Well, if "see how it goes" was Plan A, what is/was Plan B for discovering "it goes poorly"? Time for a kennel or other dogsitters?

[gosling.livejournal.com]

Now you know it goes poorly indeed, and you can absolutely refuse the next time.

Meanwhile, if it is making you crazy, get out of the house for now, and then see how you feel.

[gosling.livejournal.com]

Also, if you need to stay somewhere for a day or two, you are welcome to crash space at our house.

[lyonesse.livejournal.com]

hm. we do have a dog, but she's a gentle, polite, sweet-smelling animal :) i don't think that "seeing how it went" was a bad plan, but i think you do need a plan b of some sort at this point.

[quietann.livejournal.com]

Your dog is wonderful. If Sophie was anything like Roses, my in-laws would have a hard time getting her away from me!

Dogs

[(Anonymous)]

Sorry that sophie's driving you crazy. The thing that makes dogs more bearable than human children, however, is that you can put them in a crate (and not get arrested for it). Most dogs will do everything they can not to eliminate in their crates; though you do have to be humane and let them out to go every 8 hours or so. Most dogs will make it through the night in the crate without bursting if you take them out before bed time and pretty soon after you get up. If your father-in-law didn't bring a crate along with Sophie it might be worth it (for your sanity) to hop out to Petco and get her one. I saw that she is big, but they make big crates. For the dog, it's like having a safe den -- sophie can't be too happy, either, knowing she's doing everything wrong and upsetting these unfamiliar folks in this unfamiliar place. If you guys are not going to be able to take her out as often as she needs to go, then you should hire somebody to exercise her for you at least once a day, keep her in the crate most of the time, and remember to get her out morning and evening. And, like everybody else said, by all means don't volunteer to keep the poor beast ever again!
Lauren

Re: Dogs

[koshmom.livejournal.com]

The in-laws left a huge softsided crate, it's in quietann's kitchen. The dog has not been "crate trained" per se, but she's easy going and would likely be just fine.

Re: Dogs

[quietann.livejournal.com]

She has a large soft-sided (fabric) crate. She isn't crate-trained (insert rant about father-in-law and his opinion that the dog will lose its essential dogness if it is trained, crated, etc.) and will not go in the crate unless someone is in the room with her, and she's very, very tired. I'd be worried about her ripping it to pieces if she panics.

(oh, my father-in-law did agree to get training for the dog. She has gone through one obedience class, semi-successfully, but he didn't take it all that seriously. Mother-in-law is much more invested in her being a well-socialized dog than father-in-law is, which would not surprise anyone who knows them!)

With more training, she'd likely be easier to deal with. She is not terrible now, just young and very bouncy for something that large. She'd still be smelly and hairy, but I might be able to cope with her if she was slightly better behaved.

[koshmom.livejournal.com]

I just talked with Deguspice, and offered to take the pooch for evenings/overnites, if he comes by and takes her during the day (since she's used to people during the day). It would be a lot of driving for him, but she's cute.

[(Anonymous)]

You are a good soul. I would have offered but right now we're stripping paint in my condo so as it is Ze'eva's gated into various rooms to keep her away from the chemicals; I wouldn't want to expose another dog to all this crud.
Canine blessings upon you!
Lauren

[quietann.livejournal.com]

Just want to clarify... I am fine with sleeping with her, taking her out at night etc. so long as I do not have to work the next day, and so long as she's been exercised enough to be tired...

[koshmom.livejournal.com]

Makes it easier then! I can take sophie on the evening before you have to go to work the next morning. Have Deguspice pick up Sophie in the morning from my place (force him to drive you into town at least as far as wellington / malden to make him get the dog before I go to work.)

Note, I'd want Sophie early evening ish. So that she can get settled in before sleep time.

Dog play

[goddessfarmer.livejournal.com]

If you or spouse wants to bring the Big Dog up to play with another Big Dog, by all means, Please do so. Pedro would be happy to provide Sophie with tiredness. It's supposed to rain less tomorrow, and my schedule is pretty flexable.

[cogitationitis.livejournal.com]

I love dogs. (Well, all animals, really.) But I readily realize it would be a bad move for us to own one. Sophie is a love, and I'm sure Saffy and I tired her out today, so I hope that helped.

It might be a help if you trimmed the hair around her eyes so she could see and be less clumsy. But even so, she's young, energetic, and demanding--sure to be a handful! Be happy it will all be over next Thursday, and grit your teeth meanwhile.

[earthling177.livejournal.com]

Well, our dog is very far from perfect, and some things are really hard to train them out of (jumping on people and barking, to name just a couple), but if you want to give your father-in-law something to talk about (or even just get a dog that is easier to live with for the moment), I can teach you both a little about how to train Sophie using positive reinforcement only (it's a method called "Clicker Training" which was originally used to train dolphins). All you need to do is show up in my home (no dog necessary) and we'll go over it with my dog. You can borrow a couple of books from us and we certainly have spare clickers you can have.

Take a look at http://www.clickertraining.com/home/ -- I'm mostly sure you probably have used a similar method (if not exactly the same one) with your pet rats; it's fast and easy and at least should calm Sophie down a little if she thinks she's training you to give her treats, which is basically what the method feels like from their perspective ("Look! All I have to do is lie down quietly for 5 minutes and I get a treat!").

Hugs!

[koshmom.livejournal.com]

Sophie isn't very food driven. While I'm sure some goodie like hotdogs or cheese would appeal to her, I'm not sure that dog-trainer-novices like deguspice or quietann would get very far in the week left before sophie's folks return. However, if I had Sophie I could likely get her to do something in an evening or two (as long as my own dog Kosh doesn't get in the way of Sophie's training!).

[quietann.livejournal.com]

Actually, she'll do a lot for a green bean or three...

[wren13.livejournal.com]

Any amount of training is going to be an improvement. Let me know if you want me to read your father-in-law the riot act - she really needs to be trained.

[quietann.livejournal.com]

I agree, but dealing with Ben's father is always an adventure, and could blow up in my face in extremely unpleasant ways. (I care about my relationship with Ben more than I care about the dog.)

What I worry about is how she'll be in a year or so, when her "guard dog" instincts have really kicked in. If she so much as nicks one of the grandchildren, she'll be on a one-way trip to the vet...

However, she was much better today, but maybe she was just tired from playing with another puppy for an hour and a half! (I actually wish I'd been around for that, because it sounds like they were extremely cute... Sophie and a little Golden Retriever girl who is slightly younger...)