truckin... again

[quietann]

I have been passing everyone's comments on to Ben.

This morning I realized that if these stupid @*(#^( trucks sales guys wanted to make a sale, all they would have to do is call around until they found the right truck (2WD Tundra V8, without the stupid fancy wheels and stupid fancy stereos) and get it up here somehow. Yeah, they'd have to split the commission with the dealer they get it from, but it would work. Ben is a "live one" but those stupid fuckers haven't realized yet that he is a live one who will not spend a penny of extra money for things he doesn't want anyway.** As it is, if they don't come through, we may end up driving down to Maryland to get the right truck.

**This reminds me of an ex-boyfriend in California who bought a base model Honda Civic hatchback. He had saved his pennies through several years of college and grad school, and had *exactly* $9000 to spend (this was about 12 years ago) and a severe aversion to debt of any kind. The sales guys tried all their usual tricks, until one clued in that Steve had exactly $9000 and would not (and could not) spend a penny more. They ended up taking the radio out of a car in order to be able to sell it to him at a (small) profit.

Comments

(off-topic)....

[qilora.livejournal.com]

i just followed you over here from weirdjews... i was going to comment over there, but was too afraid i would step on toes and get flamed ;-)

when i read what you wrote, it made me think of this movie i had seen on Sundance recently called "Purity", (have you seen it?)... there was a scene where a frum woman was sitting at her kitchen table and talking with the narrator/director.. the 2 were discussing the laws surrounding niddah, and the woman started to become visibly upset (she had a medical condition that basically made her un-touchable by her husband ever, because of the length of her period and also the spotting)... her husband had been sitting there the whole time, while the woman talked, and when she started to get upset, he reached next to him and took her hand to comfort her.... despite the fact that she technically should have been "niddah" ....

it makes me think that any G-d who saw that, would see a man who had so much love and compassion for his wife, that he would rather comfort her than just go through the motions of the laws and make his wife suffer....

i think that a medical condition would make a difference in how a person would be expected to keep to the halakha... if a sick person is expected to eat on Yom Kippur, than how can someone be expected to suffer all her life without any expression of physical intimacy from her husband (esp. due to her *wanting* to keep to the law, and because of problems with her health), how can that person get healthy if they are being forced to live in this state of isolation?...

i hope i am managing to get this out properly... it makes sense in my heart and my head, but when i try to get the words out of my fingers, i am afraid that i am screwing them up ;-)

just know that i admire you and my heart goes out to you...

Shalom,
Eve & Co.

Re: (off-topic)....

[quietann.livejournal.com]

Thanks, and yes, it makes sense to me (that you would bring it over here). Actually, of all the responses, the one from xiphias was quite similar. He is an acquaintance of mine, and I know a bit of the struggle he and his wife have been through because of her medical problems. And I was so happy to learn that their rabbi gave them dispensation from the laws of family purity, especially because Lis was traumatized by going to the mikvah to "purify" herself for an event that would not happen.

I also have diabetes, and have learned over the years that a full 24-hour fast isn't a good idea for me, even with an insulin pump. I would expect that *most* rabbis would agree.

It is just that sometimes observant jews (from my outsiders perspective) seem to be in a competition with each other to see who can observe the "best." And they get soooo annoyed with those of us who choose not to observe. Sometimes I think it is projection, from feeling so much pressure to have to live up to these very strict standards, and resentment that those of us who do not observe as strictly can still call ourselves Jews.