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Sep. 11th, 2002 01:27 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
quietannThe Day has arrived, and I want to record a few memories from 9/11/2001 and the time thereafter.
I first heard the news on the radio as I was driving to catch a train to go to orientation for new students at HSPH. It was about the time the second plane hit. My initial reaction was to think it was a remake of "The War of the Worlds" (in which the radio spread a made-up story that we had been invaded by Martians!). But I scanned channels, and found that every one was reporting the same story, though with some variations in facts.
I had to decide whether to continue towards Boston, and I did, even though I had some fear of the city being attacked. (I remember being happy that I had replenished my insulin pump that morning, so I had a 4-day supply of insulin if I became unable to return home.) When I arrived at North Station, everyone -- or so it seemed -- was heading home. The MBTA was running extra outbound trains, and even so, the trains were packed with people. Downtown was emptying out. The T (subway) to HSPH was quiet. I do remember looking at downtown Boston before I entered the building, because I wasn't sure it would still be there when I was ready to go home.
It seems a bit foolish now, but I am glad I went in. Every other new graduate student in my department had, and my absence would have been conspicuous. Nonetheless it was a very distracting day. We were supposed to be learning about the department, but most of us were just desperate for news. We didn't get access to a radio or TV until the afternoon. I stood transfixed by the images, in this mass of weeping and worried strangers. A group of students and faculty put on a panel discussion and Q&A session, in which I first heard someone -- a student from the Middle East -- talk of the rest of the world's hatred for America. I don't remember how it was that it was determined that the hijackers were Arabs so quickly.
The TV stayed on in the cafeteria for the rest of the week, and I stopped by to get the latest news as often as I could stand to. I quickly discovered that I wanted to continue all my normal and scheduled activities, mostly because it kept my mind off the events, and all the fears I was feeling.
I was -- and still am -- the most scared by mindless "patriotism" and especially hatred in the guise of patriotism. When I saw a woman wearing a hijab in the T a few days after the attacks, I both applauded her and feared her slightly. Not her so much as what she might believe and what her "menfolk" might be up to. These fears have dissipated over time, but I am somewhat ashamed that I feel them at all.
And this is what my father wrote. Keep in mind he's a 75 year old, non-combat WW2 veteran, of liberal politics and much thoughtfulness. I think he says pretty much what I would, but with quite a bit more style.
REFLECTIONS ON 9/11 A YEAR LATER
Bill T.
My initial reactions to the events of 9/11 were surprise that a few
demented men could carry out such attacks, sorrow for the killed and injured, respect for the rescuers, anger that our fellow men and women would do such things to innocent civilians, and fear that similar terrorist attacks could occur elsewhere on some future dates. Of these reactions, anger and fear are the only ones to persist in my mind. I do not enjoy remembering the events themselves (so graphically and interminably given at present by the media) nor dwelling on the immediate impacts of these events. However, anger, long-term fear, and long-term impacts are worth my consideration and consideration by all the intertwined segments of American culture. These segments include: first, the American people, second, our fine institutions (religion, business, education, you name them), third, our natural habitat, and finally, our government and politicians. Also we should think about what the true legacy of 9/11 is.
Anger that our country was successfully attacked and that the victims were not the military, but innocent civilians, is normal and has not gone away. Provided our constitutional guarantees as provided in the Bill of Rights are not compromised, I applaud the efforts to bring Al Qaeda and Bin Laden to justice or eliminate them. These efforts are ongoing, will take a lot of time, and cost a great deal. So far the results are mixed: an oppressive regime in Afghanistan has been removed and terrorist training camps have been closed down, but Al Qaeda cells persist and Bin Laden may or may not still live. Difficult external intelligence efforts have not been too productive. Even though its goals are often somewhat vague, as is an enemy, this war has commenced and will proceed.
However, we must be sure that our anger is not misdirected. It should be
focused on the enemies we are sure exist (Al Qaeda), not on phantom ones (countries in a so-called "Axis of Evil"-Iraq, Iran, and North Korea). Also, the detainment of people just perceived to be enemies, but without sufficient cause, seems to be a violation of principles upon which our country was founded. It is difficult, in our ill-defined "war", to avoid unjustness, but all segments of our society-the people, various institutions, government, and politicians should be vigilant to preserve our rights.
Long-term fear, particularly of the unknown, breeds chronic anxiety, and I believe that there are very few ordinary U.S. citizens that are not more anxious that they were before 9/11. Anxiety is normal, and should be distinguished from fear. I try to put fear out of my thinking and am somewhat callous about possibilities of further terrorist attacks. They may or may not happen-where and when, we do not know-and if they do occur and affect me and the people I love, so be it. For me this seems the only way -to recognize possible severe adversities, face up to them, but not dwell on them too much. At the end of the autobiography of his early years entitled "Of Men and Mountains" (his first and probably his best book), the late Supreme Court justice, William O. Douglas, tells of his feelings about being stuck high on a mountain cliff with nowhere to go, really facing fear and possible death, and eventually working through his predicament. He said that this experience left him "strangely, free to live." I recently read an interview on the 9/11 experience by Dr. Rachel Naomi Remen, a pediatrician turned counselor to cancer patients and author of wonderful insightful books--for instance," Kitchen Table Wisdom". She suggests that 9/11 fears are comparable to those of newly diagnosed cancer patients and has described many cases where her patients have successfully
worked through their feelings. However, 9/11 fears are widespread. Facing up to them, being callous about them, and carrying on seem to me to be the only way of perhaps alleviating them. Even so we should not surrender, but pursue this war with vigor. In my mountaineering I have, on at least two occasions, faced fear and possible death, and have come through them echoing Justice Douglas' feelings of being free to live. Such experiences and feelings must be common in heart bypass and transplant patients, too.
The short-term impacts of 9/11 have been profound. In anger and wanting
justice, among the people there was an immediate upsurge in patriotic feelings that have been expressed by the display of our flag variously throughout the nation. No official or politician appears without the little flag pin in his or her lapel. I submit that although we love our country, flag displays may be only superficial and do not substitute for actions to improve the United States. Flag waving is a short-term response and cannot mask the multitude of problems that we face. I believe that all thinking citizens realize this, but do our government and the officials
and politicians from whom we expect leadership? In this case, the American people are probably well ahead of their so-called "leaders".
Long-term impacts are much more important than the short-term ones. Our leaders seem to be using 9/11 as an excuse for various of our nation's ills. They seem to want to perpetuate the status quo, rather than move on to a much better society. Thus they wish to drill for oil promiscuously here and there - even raping the environment and depleting resources that our descendents will most likely need-all this without thought, and only with a "gimme mine now" attitude. Our present government supports such activities without regard to moving toward a sustainable economy. I am sure our leaders do all this without considering the general will of the people, and they often promote such activities in secret. Only their cronies are privy to what is happening. These actions and attitudes have led to greed in business affairs and the present Wall Street mess. 9/11 has served elegantly to mask these ills by diverting our attention from them. Because of 9/11 we are asked to follow blindly: Don't fret, big government (the so called "they") will take care of everything. We are also told that as an adjunct to the "War on Terrorism" that started after 9/11, we must move militarily against Iraq. This is foolhardy: more Muslims will hate us even more, and more 9/11s will ensue.
There are many long-term problems affecting not only American citizens, but
most of humanity, that are more important than the "War on Terrorism". I could go on and on, but I will mention only a few: Most people in the world are very poor, yet in the U.S. we are rich. Is it not possible to spend more of our funds to alleviate this situation? There will be a
shortage of fresh water throughout the world. What is being done about this? Global warming will impact all people, yet our leaders are only paying lip service to this problem. The U.S. is not acting as a good world citizen by refusing to sign or at least work on modifying the Kyoto agreement-this attitude leads to great hatred of our nation. What has happened to our traditions of goodwill toward all?
Finally, what will be the true legacy of 9/11? Dr. Remen suggests that presently we are caught up in horrible memories of this event, in superficial feelings of patriotism, and an emphasis on "freedom". All of these are valid, but she implies some overriding questions: Where is wisdom? Are not wise choices the true road to freedom? If we are intelligent to see it, wisdom within all of our activities is the true legacy of 9/11. Can we not recognize why this attack occurred, how we are hated, and act accordingly? We must try to encourage our leaders to be wiser in their decisions. Rather than military solutions to the important problem of terrorism, it would be wise to make public diplomacy our highest priority and put our resources into peaceful measures. We must do what we can to show all peoples that we care about them as well as ourselves. Down deep, I feel most Americans are really wise enough to see through the shams that our government is pursuing in this "War" to the detriment of solving much more important problems. Will we act by transmitting these ideas and feelings to our leaders? Such actions are true patriotism!
I first heard the news on the radio as I was driving to catch a train to go to orientation for new students at HSPH. It was about the time the second plane hit. My initial reaction was to think it was a remake of "The War of the Worlds" (in which the radio spread a made-up story that we had been invaded by Martians!). But I scanned channels, and found that every one was reporting the same story, though with some variations in facts.
I had to decide whether to continue towards Boston, and I did, even though I had some fear of the city being attacked. (I remember being happy that I had replenished my insulin pump that morning, so I had a 4-day supply of insulin if I became unable to return home.) When I arrived at North Station, everyone -- or so it seemed -- was heading home. The MBTA was running extra outbound trains, and even so, the trains were packed with people. Downtown was emptying out. The T (subway) to HSPH was quiet. I do remember looking at downtown Boston before I entered the building, because I wasn't sure it would still be there when I was ready to go home.
It seems a bit foolish now, but I am glad I went in. Every other new graduate student in my department had, and my absence would have been conspicuous. Nonetheless it was a very distracting day. We were supposed to be learning about the department, but most of us were just desperate for news. We didn't get access to a radio or TV until the afternoon. I stood transfixed by the images, in this mass of weeping and worried strangers. A group of students and faculty put on a panel discussion and Q&A session, in which I first heard someone -- a student from the Middle East -- talk of the rest of the world's hatred for America. I don't remember how it was that it was determined that the hijackers were Arabs so quickly.
The TV stayed on in the cafeteria for the rest of the week, and I stopped by to get the latest news as often as I could stand to. I quickly discovered that I wanted to continue all my normal and scheduled activities, mostly because it kept my mind off the events, and all the fears I was feeling.
I was -- and still am -- the most scared by mindless "patriotism" and especially hatred in the guise of patriotism. When I saw a woman wearing a hijab in the T a few days after the attacks, I both applauded her and feared her slightly. Not her so much as what she might believe and what her "menfolk" might be up to. These fears have dissipated over time, but I am somewhat ashamed that I feel them at all.
And this is what my father wrote. Keep in mind he's a 75 year old, non-combat WW2 veteran, of liberal politics and much thoughtfulness. I think he says pretty much what I would, but with quite a bit more style.
REFLECTIONS ON 9/11 A YEAR LATER
Bill T.
My initial reactions to the events of 9/11 were surprise that a few
demented men could carry out such attacks, sorrow for the killed and injured, respect for the rescuers, anger that our fellow men and women would do such things to innocent civilians, and fear that similar terrorist attacks could occur elsewhere on some future dates. Of these reactions, anger and fear are the only ones to persist in my mind. I do not enjoy remembering the events themselves (so graphically and interminably given at present by the media) nor dwelling on the immediate impacts of these events. However, anger, long-term fear, and long-term impacts are worth my consideration and consideration by all the intertwined segments of American culture. These segments include: first, the American people, second, our fine institutions (religion, business, education, you name them), third, our natural habitat, and finally, our government and politicians. Also we should think about what the true legacy of 9/11 is.
Anger that our country was successfully attacked and that the victims were not the military, but innocent civilians, is normal and has not gone away. Provided our constitutional guarantees as provided in the Bill of Rights are not compromised, I applaud the efforts to bring Al Qaeda and Bin Laden to justice or eliminate them. These efforts are ongoing, will take a lot of time, and cost a great deal. So far the results are mixed: an oppressive regime in Afghanistan has been removed and terrorist training camps have been closed down, but Al Qaeda cells persist and Bin Laden may or may not still live. Difficult external intelligence efforts have not been too productive. Even though its goals are often somewhat vague, as is an enemy, this war has commenced and will proceed.
However, we must be sure that our anger is not misdirected. It should be
focused on the enemies we are sure exist (Al Qaeda), not on phantom ones (countries in a so-called "Axis of Evil"-Iraq, Iran, and North Korea). Also, the detainment of people just perceived to be enemies, but without sufficient cause, seems to be a violation of principles upon which our country was founded. It is difficult, in our ill-defined "war", to avoid unjustness, but all segments of our society-the people, various institutions, government, and politicians should be vigilant to preserve our rights.
Long-term fear, particularly of the unknown, breeds chronic anxiety, and I believe that there are very few ordinary U.S. citizens that are not more anxious that they were before 9/11. Anxiety is normal, and should be distinguished from fear. I try to put fear out of my thinking and am somewhat callous about possibilities of further terrorist attacks. They may or may not happen-where and when, we do not know-and if they do occur and affect me and the people I love, so be it. For me this seems the only way -to recognize possible severe adversities, face up to them, but not dwell on them too much. At the end of the autobiography of his early years entitled "Of Men and Mountains" (his first and probably his best book), the late Supreme Court justice, William O. Douglas, tells of his feelings about being stuck high on a mountain cliff with nowhere to go, really facing fear and possible death, and eventually working through his predicament. He said that this experience left him "strangely, free to live." I recently read an interview on the 9/11 experience by Dr. Rachel Naomi Remen, a pediatrician turned counselor to cancer patients and author of wonderful insightful books--for instance," Kitchen Table Wisdom". She suggests that 9/11 fears are comparable to those of newly diagnosed cancer patients and has described many cases where her patients have successfully
worked through their feelings. However, 9/11 fears are widespread. Facing up to them, being callous about them, and carrying on seem to me to be the only way of perhaps alleviating them. Even so we should not surrender, but pursue this war with vigor. In my mountaineering I have, on at least two occasions, faced fear and possible death, and have come through them echoing Justice Douglas' feelings of being free to live. Such experiences and feelings must be common in heart bypass and transplant patients, too.
The short-term impacts of 9/11 have been profound. In anger and wanting
justice, among the people there was an immediate upsurge in patriotic feelings that have been expressed by the display of our flag variously throughout the nation. No official or politician appears without the little flag pin in his or her lapel. I submit that although we love our country, flag displays may be only superficial and do not substitute for actions to improve the United States. Flag waving is a short-term response and cannot mask the multitude of problems that we face. I believe that all thinking citizens realize this, but do our government and the officials
and politicians from whom we expect leadership? In this case, the American people are probably well ahead of their so-called "leaders".
Long-term impacts are much more important than the short-term ones. Our leaders seem to be using 9/11 as an excuse for various of our nation's ills. They seem to want to perpetuate the status quo, rather than move on to a much better society. Thus they wish to drill for oil promiscuously here and there - even raping the environment and depleting resources that our descendents will most likely need-all this without thought, and only with a "gimme mine now" attitude. Our present government supports such activities without regard to moving toward a sustainable economy. I am sure our leaders do all this without considering the general will of the people, and they often promote such activities in secret. Only their cronies are privy to what is happening. These actions and attitudes have led to greed in business affairs and the present Wall Street mess. 9/11 has served elegantly to mask these ills by diverting our attention from them. Because of 9/11 we are asked to follow blindly: Don't fret, big government (the so called "they") will take care of everything. We are also told that as an adjunct to the "War on Terrorism" that started after 9/11, we must move militarily against Iraq. This is foolhardy: more Muslims will hate us even more, and more 9/11s will ensue.
There are many long-term problems affecting not only American citizens, but
most of humanity, that are more important than the "War on Terrorism". I could go on and on, but I will mention only a few: Most people in the world are very poor, yet in the U.S. we are rich. Is it not possible to spend more of our funds to alleviate this situation? There will be a
shortage of fresh water throughout the world. What is being done about this? Global warming will impact all people, yet our leaders are only paying lip service to this problem. The U.S. is not acting as a good world citizen by refusing to sign or at least work on modifying the Kyoto agreement-this attitude leads to great hatred of our nation. What has happened to our traditions of goodwill toward all?
Finally, what will be the true legacy of 9/11? Dr. Remen suggests that presently we are caught up in horrible memories of this event, in superficial feelings of patriotism, and an emphasis on "freedom". All of these are valid, but she implies some overriding questions: Where is wisdom? Are not wise choices the true road to freedom? If we are intelligent to see it, wisdom within all of our activities is the true legacy of 9/11. Can we not recognize why this attack occurred, how we are hated, and act accordingly? We must try to encourage our leaders to be wiser in their decisions. Rather than military solutions to the important problem of terrorism, it would be wise to make public diplomacy our highest priority and put our resources into peaceful measures. We must do what we can to show all peoples that we care about them as well as ourselves. Down deep, I feel most Americans are really wise enough to see through the shams that our government is pursuing in this "War" to the detriment of solving much more important problems. Will we act by transmitting these ideas and feelings to our leaders? Such actions are true patriotism!
