On Reaching 40
Mar. 15th, 2004 03:06 pmA few thoughts on reaching 40:
I am inclined to compare this birthday to my 30th, which was at a very difficult time in my life. I threw myself a party so as to have a reason not to throw myself in front of a truck. Things would not get better for quite a while, but I didn't know how much worse they would get first.
Said experiences didn't *change* me as much as crystallize some things about me. #1 is a rather extreme need for truth. #2 is learning to live with the fact that I really will never truly know what is going on in someone else's head.
I don't remember my 20th or 10th birthdays at all.
I still have zits. And an antibiotic prescription for said zits, and hence a yeast infection. ugh.
I look a lot younger than 40, but physically I feel at least that old. I have arthritis, my metabolism has really downshifted in the past few years, and I may be in perimenopause. I have wrinklles and grey hairs. Diabetics age more quickly than other folks.
Speaking of which... while a lot of my (usually slightly younger) friends are pregnant or trying to get pregnant, I have happily avoidedhaving kids entirely. I am fascinated with the process, but I'd rather observe it than experience it, thankyouverymuch.
I suspect that in 10 years or so, said younger friends will be where I am now, WRT female issues.
My dad is absolutely thrilled that I have made it to 40. There have been points where he wasn't sure I would, and points where he wasn't sure he'd witness my turning 40. The only thing we both miss in the process is my mom.
My rat Morning Dew gave me a present of 10 babies for my birthday :)
I am inclined to compare this birthday to my 30th, which was at a very difficult time in my life. I threw myself a party so as to have a reason not to throw myself in front of a truck. Things would not get better for quite a while, but I didn't know how much worse they would get first.
Said experiences didn't *change* me as much as crystallize some things about me. #1 is a rather extreme need for truth. #2 is learning to live with the fact that I really will never truly know what is going on in someone else's head.
I don't remember my 20th or 10th birthdays at all.
I still have zits. And an antibiotic prescription for said zits, and hence a yeast infection. ugh.
I look a lot younger than 40, but physically I feel at least that old. I have arthritis, my metabolism has really downshifted in the past few years, and I may be in perimenopause. I have wrinklles and grey hairs. Diabetics age more quickly than other folks.
Speaking of which... while a lot of my (usually slightly younger) friends are pregnant or trying to get pregnant, I have happily avoidedhaving kids entirely. I am fascinated with the process, but I'd rather observe it than experience it, thankyouverymuch.
I suspect that in 10 years or so, said younger friends will be where I am now, WRT female issues.
My dad is absolutely thrilled that I have made it to 40. There have been points where he wasn't sure I would, and points where he wasn't sure he'd witness my turning 40. The only thing we both miss in the process is my mom.
My rat Morning Dew gave me a present of 10 babies for my birthday :)
no subject
Date: 2004-03-15 01:49 pm (UTC)happy 40!
(you whippersnapper!)
no subject
Date: 2004-03-15 05:29 pm (UTC)I understand about watching the ten-years-younger crowd doing the baby thing. I remain enough of a biologist to be interested in the process but am still glad I haven't experienced it firsthand.
Sorry I couldn't make your dinner. Hope you had lots of yummy kitfo, shiro, and the like.